Yes, we've all been there when it comes to rude apartment neighbors who seem to have no regard for everyone else around them. Late nights of loud music, walking on hardwood floors with shoes on, loud lovemaking, awful cooking smells, arguing in the parking lot, you name it. The list goes on and on.
Things often get so bad that you don't even want to come home from work anymore, but that's no way to live. Before you embark on a campaign of shock and awe, consider that there might be better ways to resolve the problem. Then again, sometimes you have to take drastic measures. Here are five great ways to “get back” at the noisy neighbors (without breaking the law, that is). You might be able to get them to move if you don't give up. Otherwise, you'll just have yourself an entertaining go at it.
Disclaimer: this article is for entertainment purposes only. Any information provided does not, and is not intended to, constitute advice nor does it encourage dangerous or illegal behavior. Your use of the content is solely at your own risk, and Apartment Picks assumes no liability.
Kill Them With Kindness
This is the first thing you should do, even after your neighbor was blasting music until 2 am. There's a chance they may see the error of their ways when you tell them that you live next door. Plus, nothing burns someone who doesn't care about anyone else like someone who's kind to them for no reason. If you ring the neighbor's doorbell and introduce yourselves, it's always a good start (although no guarantee that things will change, of course). You don't have to be overly sweet, and by all means, bring a simple baked good and keep it brief.
Be The Mystery Caller in the Dead of Night
If you can figure out a way to toggle off your own caller ID from being seen by recipients, this is the perfect way to give just desserts to your annoying neighbor. Find their phone number through the internet and call them at crazy hours. When they pick up the phone, make creepy sounds or just breathe heavily into the phone. Better yet, call them when you're out of town and just blast music into the phone. Use different phones like hotel phones, friend's phones, etc. just to mix things up in case they block you.
Sign Them Up For Bizarre Magazine Subscriptions
While it might cost you some money, this one could be totally worth it. All you have to do is find their name and address and get them a handful of crazy magazine subscriptions that will show up in their mailbox or their door for all the world to see. Try to keep it clean (in case they have kids or a heart condition), but just unload all manner of weirdness on them. Great titles like Sheep! Magazine, OMFG, Teddy Bear Times, and Emu Today & Tomorrow, this could just be the gift that keeps on giving. Plus, they'll never know where they came from.
Plant a Mystery Noisemaker in their Apartment
This one takes some brains and planning, but it could be the straw that breaks the camel's back. You can buy a mystery noisemaker off Amazon for $12 and find a way to plant it somewhere in their apartment. This part means you have to be creative, whether you pay a maintenance worker to plant it or you do it yourself when you go to bring them baked goods and ask to use their bathroom. What these noisemakers do is let off a chirp every ten minutes or so, and it'll take them days to figure out where on earth it's coming from. It's enough to drive someone mad.
Find Their Electrical Panel and Shut It Off
Okay, so this one's not particularly nice, but it gets IMMEDIATE results. Usually, electrical panels are located in the basement or laundry room. They are typically labeled clearly according to the apartment unit. Make sure you know exactly which unit is the violator and randomly shut off their electricity when things get loud. Sometimes, you have to let the noise go on one night, and then the next time it happens, just make things go dark. They'll wonder what the hell is going on and won't be able to figure it out.